Thursday, September 3, 2009
♥ Turning 20
The age of 19 had been a very rocky one. I went through so many different transitions, of new jobs, new people, less people then less communication. Not only a year ago today was I the hot topic, then I shyed away from that scene once I saw how stupid people can turn out from it.
I disconnected from a lot of people, but do my best at communicating with who I can. My goal was to have a license and be in school by now...LAWL. That didn't happen because I got lazy. Way too lazy, but not lazy enough to not work. I love having a job and I love being able to pay for things myself. I need a second job so I can pay off my bills and make it so that the money I AM making can all be spent on what "I" want and my cellphone bill haha.
I'm the last in the group to go to school, which is weird because I thought out of my group of friends I would be the there and stay there. There is some comfort in knowing some aren't going back, but anxiety because I want the best for them AND I want the best for myself too.
I dated here and there and messed around there and here. Nothing special, nothing to gloat about, not that I ever gloated about relationships anyways. I'm too young for the drama and complications that come with being in love. That can wait until I'm 30. 10 fucking years to go, jesus christ, they'll be here before I know if I don't get kissed by a city bus before then.
This week has been pretty bland and I'll have to say the highlight of it is the fact that I sat my fighting mother and brother down and made them kiss and make up. The most involved I've been with my family in years and I kinda liked playing mediator. I also liked seeing them smile then "huff, puff and blow their annoyance around", The house is much more peaceful, peaceful enough that I rearranged my room and gave it a welcome feel as opposed to 'Get The Fuck Out' emotion.
I think I'll send this post off with a list of goals I want to achieve before the age of 21.
What I want to achieve:
I will think of more along the way, but I'll check them off as I go along :D
♥ Nessa
I disconnected from a lot of people, but do my best at communicating with who I can. My goal was to have a license and be in school by now...LAWL. That didn't happen because I got lazy. Way too lazy, but not lazy enough to not work. I love having a job and I love being able to pay for things myself. I need a second job so I can pay off my bills and make it so that the money I AM making can all be spent on what "I" want and my cellphone bill haha.
I'm the last in the group to go to school, which is weird because I thought out of my group of friends I would be the there and stay there. There is some comfort in knowing some aren't going back, but anxiety because I want the best for them AND I want the best for myself too.
I dated here and there and messed around there and here. Nothing special, nothing to gloat about, not that I ever gloated about relationships anyways. I'm too young for the drama and complications that come with being in love. That can wait until I'm 30. 10 fucking years to go, jesus christ, they'll be here before I know if I don't get kissed by a city bus before then.
This week has been pretty bland and I'll have to say the highlight of it is the fact that I sat my fighting mother and brother down and made them kiss and make up. The most involved I've been with my family in years and I kinda liked playing mediator. I also liked seeing them smile then "huff, puff and blow their annoyance around", The house is much more peaceful, peaceful enough that I rearranged my room and gave it a welcome feel as opposed to 'Get The Fuck Out' emotion.
I think I'll send this post off with a list of goals I want to achieve before the age of 21.
What I want to achieve:
- A license.
- Clear all my debt (about 1500.00 worth)
- Have a good enough income to support my school tuition next year.
- Lose 40 pounds. (I'm at 1 fucking 70, it doesn't show b/c I'm tall, BUT I SEE IT)
- Live a healthier lifestyle.
- Purchase a cintiq tablet. (I'm hoping to win a Wacom Intuos4 from RoyalTutorials. fingers crossed)
- Find a second job.
- Spend less time on the computer.
I will think of more along the way, but I'll check them off as I go along :D
♥ Nessa
5:32 PM